At 3:34 a.m. I awoke from the singularly most wonderful dream I’ve had in a while.  I dreamt I had a baby.

Usually, when I dream about having a baby, it causes all brands of anxiety.  Perhaps this is because, dream baby comes without warning.  In the dream, I realize that I have a baby, and then about 5 dream days into the scenario, I realize I have not one diaper. Nary a baby onesie. No carseat, no crib, no nothing.  I have no tools to care for this baby.  I wake up feeling tired, but most of all completely and utterly STRESSED. OUT.

Last night’s dream was different. 

I don’t remember too much of what was going on in the dream (there was alot happening) but I do remember crystal-clearly the part where I dream-woke in a hospital bed with my mom at my side.  The nurse came in and handed me this little baby burrito with a full fuzz-head of hair.  She was the sweetest little bundle. 

After I woke, I spent the better part of the next 4 hours trying as hard as I could to get back to that sweet swaddled little baby girl.  I never did get back there, but I hope I can one day.

Our “home improvement project” is something I have shared here before.  I’ve made no secret of my frustration at not getting pregnant.  It just hasn’t happened for us…yet.  I tell myself over and over that I just need to relax.  Not stress.  Eat well.  Excerise.  It’s worth every breath, every stretch, every bite, every sweat-inducing minute on the treadmill. TOTALLY worth it.


5 thoughts on “

  1. i'm not big into metaphysical stuff, religion, spirits, etc. what i am big on, though, is signs from the universe. i've been getting a TON of these lately – some good, some not-so-good – and they always seem to end up coming true as signaled. it's weird. i'm hoping this is one of those things for you…

  2. What a dream!

    It'll happen at the right moment (forgive me for how incredibly lame that is).

    Happy, happy thoughts going your direction.

  3. Those are the best dreams and I do miss my baby burrito. Sigh.

    What do you think about accupuncture? I know its a strange suggestion. I had taken a month off of trying and just tried to relax and exercise and take care of me. I did one session before returning to the “battlefield.” The next month: preggers.

    You're in my thoughts, my friend.

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