Things at work are crazycrazycrazy and this week was definitely a little intense. Along with the time change, I had only 2 proper days in the office. The other three were completely consumed with full-day events at high schools, board meetings, and other engagements. I had three really early mornings in a row…which meant that by 3 p.m., I’d already put in a full 8 hour day with no lunch break….only to return to the office for another 2-3 hours of work. This, along with the time change, made for an interesting week of sleep(or, more accurately, a lack thereof). My eating habits got off because I wasn’t eating breakfast or lunch and when I was eating, it was junk. So the stress, exhaustion, and icky diet all came to a head this weekend when I had a horrible night of sleep on Friday night and felt pretty shitty on Saturday for most of the day. Not only was I nauseous and tired, but my emotions were on my sleeve. It was some serious un-fun to say the least.
What it did get me thinking about (for the billionth time) is how I’m constantly working my ass off to fulfill others needs, but, somehow, I’m not fulfilling my own. I have a serious lack of dedication to myself. I’m not eating well, I’m not managing my stress, I’m not getting quality rest. As a direct result of these things, I’m letting myself fall apart. How long can I keep this up? I’m at a little loss of what to do. I clearly need some motivation in all parts of my life. I don’t excercise, I don’t belong to any social groups (besides book club), and I don’t really socialize with friends independently (though I wouldn’t say that I’m antisocial).
Don’t get me wrong–I manage. I keep the house (sorta) clean, I run errands on weekends and cook and read and those things usually give me a certain level of joy. All in all, I think I do a pretty decent job at keeping life going while Kevin is in class during the week. I just don’t manage well. I’m also usually at work until atleast 6 p.m., I usually bring work home with me mentally and emotionally, I have trouble sleeping, stomach issues, and have periods of melancholy. I enjoy having time to myself, but at times have difficulty figuring out how to best spend that time. It’s pretty frustrating. I’ve tried nightly bubble baths and have started using lavender oil at night before I go to sleep as part of an aromatherapy treatment suggested to me. But I haven’t been able to find something that is the answer for all areas.
I’m putting this out there in the hopes that you will give me some suggestions. Have you gone through this? What kinds of things have you done to help relax and de-stress? Any foods or diets that have worked well? Sleeping techniques? Any wisdom you have to share would be most appreciated. I know I can find a way out of this tragic spiral and I’m certainly not rock-bottom by any means. I just know I can be happier.